Family’s a mixed and fruity bunch, not unlike the Australian organic wines we love at The Green Cube. And with the silly season just around the corner, one thing we can count on is the antics and hilarious stories of guests who stroll through our door on Christmas day – some bearing gifts, others keen for a free feed. Will any of these guests be seated at your Christmas table this year?
Bears gifts that look strangely familiar from Christmases gone by and insists the 2010 Calendar in unused condition will be good to go in 2021. Contributes a store-bought salad (reduced to clear) to the table; grazes on the best cuts of meat. Feigns surprise when they can’t find the top-shelf bottle of wine they swore they packed in the car.
Runs Christmas with military precision. Announces the Kris Kringle list in October and has the Christmas menu planned by November. Spends Christmas day complaining about swarms of relatives lazing around the house but refuses to let anyone take over the most important task at hand: rotating the BBQ snags.
Delays entire family opening Christmas presents because the official rules state that everyone must be up. Stays awake long enough to consume three days’ worth of food in one sitting then lapses into food coma. Plays Christmas cricket if the ball rolls close enough to their deck chair. Insists this year has taken its’ toll but just spent 3 weeks in Bali, also horizontal.